God's Plan (Amanda)

"For I know the plans I have for you,"declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." ~Jeremiah 29:11

Thank you, Inez, for the reminder. Most of us are familiar with this verse, have heard it a thousand times, especially at momentous occasions in our lives (graduations, etc.). But are we familiar with the chapter of the Israelites' story that elicited this promise? I was led to read over this chapter where God speaks to the Israelites who have been captured and kept in the strange land of Babylon.

God has a plan for each of us, even when we find ourselves in uncomfortable places. And as I sat in Ashtyn's room and rocked a fussy baby (teething, general discomfort, who knows?), I was reminded of God's provision for us. How in His infinite wisdom, He knew to give us precious Ashtyn at just this time.

My first thoughts were of the difficulties of moving and settling with an infant and a preschooler, etc. But then I realized as I rocked my little angel, that God knew that in these days I would need reminders of His love for me, and that Ashtyn is that reminder. That every couple of hours I must stop what I'm doing and be still, so Ashtyn's basic need for nourishment can be met. I am reminded that my most important job right now is not unpacking boxes, but cherishing this priceless gift God has given me to care for. God's plan is for me to be a mother, and that calling trumps all others. He has led me here to a place where my girls can truly be my first priority. And sometimes I must stop what I'm doing and just hold my babies, because they need me.

I was reminded of that little poem that talks about how sweeping and scrubbing can wait, because babies grow up so quickly, etc. As I held Ashtyn, her life flashed before my eyes, not the short one that she has already led, but I realized that, God willing, I will someday rock her babies, and I faced that horror that every parent must face: she will become a teenager first. She will date, she will leave us to go off to college or whatever path life leads her down, she will probably marry and have children of her own someday. Stop. Cherish the moment right now where she is in my arms. Because it won't be long until she is running around chasing Ryleigh, and neither of them will want to stop and let Mommy just hold them. I thought of how my own mother and grandmothers rocked me and now rock my babies. I thought about that pain I feel at seeing Ryleigh and Ashtyn in pain, and the joy I feel when they smile. The joy on Ryleigh's face last night as she licked her huge pink and purple ice cream cone (cotton candy flavor -- it was disgusting) was priceless. And how magnified God's pain and God's joy must be as He watches His children travel this earthly journey. Samantha shared that thought with me last week as we watched Maddie's tears as she and Ryleigh ended their last playdate before the move.

God is great, all the time. He has a plan for my life. I'm just trying to stay in the center of His will, even when it isn't exactly what I wanted. His plan is always better than mine.