It's been a while since I've blogged, partly because it's been a busy time around here -- check out our other blog at www.buttervalleyharvest.com, and partly because I just haven't felt like sharing. Emotionally, the transition to life in PA has not been easy for me. Keeping up with the girls, the housework, the things I should do, the things I want to do, etc. has been a little overwhelming at times. We still haven't unpacked everything. Yes, we have too much stuff. And I've spent a lot of time staying up too late and then being exhausted!
Anyway, today I am feeling hopeful, for the first time in a while. For some reason, God suddenly gave me peace about life yesterday. I was riding in my dad's car (we celebrated Ben's birthday in Philly last night, and we rode with my parents), having one of those random conversations with myself that I tend to have more frequently than I care to admit. Anyway, I just decided I was tired of feeling depressed about what I was missing, and that if this is really where God wants me to be, then he must have a reason, so I should just go with it. It's always better to go with God than against Him. He always wins anyway, and it's much easier to just go with Him right away than fight it and end up in the same place anyway, just a little more scarred by the journey.
One of my biggest discouragements was feeling like we would never find a church that felt like home. Since most of our close friendships, support system, etc. came from our connections at Fairfax Community, I feel like without a church home, this will never feel like home. We've visited several churches nearby and been disappointed in some way by all of them. We found out last week that the one we were considering visiting again is losing its senior pastor, so that wasn't something we wanted to get in the middle of. We were starting to feel like we wouldn't find anything where both the music and the preaching measured up to Chris and Rod at FCC.
So today, we decided to take a little longer drive to church and visited Branch Creek. We were so blessed by the worship and teaching this morning. We are still in discussion about whether it is a distance we want to drive once or twice a week, especially since it will be even further away once we move over near the farm. I don't want to visit again until we decide that distance is OK (it isn't that far). I don't want to get even a little attached. But I think today, whether or not this eventually becomes our church home, I just needed a service I didn't feel the need to criticize somewhere along the line. I was able to just relax and enjoy the time. The service felt a lot like FCC, and that was just what we needed. At other churches we've visited, there was a point in each service where I felt uncomfortable. I never felt that way here, and for that I am so grateful. And hopeful.
Please pray that I will be able to continue in an attitude of peace and hope. Pray for our church home, wherever it ends up being. I feel better today than I have in a long time, so please pray that my spirits stay up. Blessings to you, friend!
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
New Beginnings (Amanda)
Today was another day of blessing. We held the official groundbreaking and dedication for Butter Valley Harvest this afternoon on the Ehst Homestead Farm. The last two days since we arrived home from the Derstine Reunion in New Hampshire have been full of stress, anxiety, and activity as we prepared for today. I am (and I think we are all) so glad it is over. I just finished looking through the pictures Aunt Barb took today, and was able in the quiet of this evening to just reflect and feel blessed.
Blessed because so many family and friends came to be with us today. Our siblings, our parents, our grandparents, our aunts and uncles, our cousins, and many friends from the Bally community joined with us in prayer and praise today. It was such a joy to share the history of the Ehst farm with everyone and know that now I, too, am a part of that story. As we talked about the things that were added, changed, and modernized by various generations of Ehsts, it was crazy to think that someday, our great-great-grandchildren may talk about us and the beginning of the hydroponic (or Soilless Environmentally Controlled Agriculture) farming on the land.
As we stood on the ground where this week, excavation will begin for the greenhouse foundation, it was a privilege as well as a humbling experience, to be surrounded by everyone as we committed Butter Valley Harvest to God. We sang "Great is Thy Faithfulness" as an expression of all the God has already done in and for us and the generations who came before. Greg Bowman shared some thoughts out of his passion for locally-grown food, the environment, and his God before offering a sweet prayer on our behalf. Then we planned for three generations of Ehsts to break the ground (Pop, Dad, and Ryan). But generation #4 wanted in, too. Ryleigh helped to break ground after her Daddy. It was really special. Then Melissa led us in a responsive reading she had put together. Uncle John Ehst gathered us all in close for a final prayer. Those moments were really special as our friends and family huddled around us, lifting us and the business to the Father. Uncle John Derstine led us in another song "Be Thou My Vision" as we looked forward to God's continuing guidance. The afternoon ended with everyone gathered in the yard, sharing refreshments and fellowship.
Blessed because so many family and friends came to be with us today. Our siblings, our parents, our grandparents, our aunts and uncles, our cousins, and many friends from the Bally community joined with us in prayer and praise today. It was such a joy to share the history of the Ehst farm with everyone and know that now I, too, am a part of that story. As we talked about the things that were added, changed, and modernized by various generations of Ehsts, it was crazy to think that someday, our great-great-grandchildren may talk about us and the beginning of the hydroponic (or Soilless Environmentally Controlled Agriculture) farming on the land.
As we stood on the ground where this week, excavation will begin for the greenhouse foundation, it was a privilege as well as a humbling experience, to be surrounded by everyone as we committed Butter Valley Harvest to God. We sang "Great is Thy Faithfulness" as an expression of all the God has already done in and for us and the generations who came before. Greg Bowman shared some thoughts out of his passion for locally-grown food, the environment, and his God before offering a sweet prayer on our behalf. Then we planned for three generations of Ehsts to break the ground (Pop, Dad, and Ryan). But generation #4 wanted in, too. Ryleigh helped to break ground after her Daddy. It was really special. Then Melissa led us in a responsive reading she had put together. Uncle John Ehst gathered us all in close for a final prayer. Those moments were really special as our friends and family huddled around us, lifting us and the business to the Father. Uncle John Derstine led us in another song "Be Thou My Vision" as we looked forward to God's continuing guidance. The afternoon ended with everyone gathered in the yard, sharing refreshments and fellowship.
I haven't had a positive attitude about this in a while, especially this last week or so. Today was very humbling, very blessing, and I am very grateful. If you were part of our day and are reading this, thank you from the bottom of my heart for supporting us and believing in us. And Aunt Doris, if you read this, thank you so much for your words. At least I know, when the tears fall, that I'm not crazy! :) And for all of you out there who couldn't be with us today but have been lifting us in prayer, thank you for that. And please continue. We are so grateful for your support.
Just another note about the smaller, funny ways God sometimes lets us know he's there. This past week (while we were away), someone put up really nice roadside signs along Route 100 that say "Now entering the beautiful Butter Valley." Most people drive through the area and don't know it's the Butter Valley. This felt like an affirmation of our use of the name in Butter Valley Harvest. And now people will know when they drive through, where they are. It's just a little thing. But it's kinda' cool. And it's just a little reminder that God is present in all things.
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