It's been a while since I've blogged, partly because it's been a busy time around here -- check out our other blog at www.buttervalleyharvest.com, and partly because I just haven't felt like sharing. Emotionally, the transition to life in PA has not been easy for me. Keeping up with the girls, the housework, the things I should do, the things I want to do, etc. has been a little overwhelming at times. We still haven't unpacked everything. Yes, we have too much stuff. And I've spent a lot of time staying up too late and then being exhausted!
Anyway, today I am feeling hopeful, for the first time in a while. For some reason, God suddenly gave me peace about life yesterday. I was riding in my dad's car (we celebrated Ben's birthday in Philly last night, and we rode with my parents), having one of those random conversations with myself that I tend to have more frequently than I care to admit. Anyway, I just decided I was tired of feeling depressed about what I was missing, and that if this is really where God wants me to be, then he must have a reason, so I should just go with it. It's always better to go with God than against Him. He always wins anyway, and it's much easier to just go with Him right away than fight it and end up in the same place anyway, just a little more scarred by the journey.
One of my biggest discouragements was feeling like we would never find a church that felt like home. Since most of our close friendships, support system, etc. came from our connections at Fairfax Community, I feel like without a church home, this will never feel like home. We've visited several churches nearby and been disappointed in some way by all of them. We found out last week that the one we were considering visiting again is losing its senior pastor, so that wasn't something we wanted to get in the middle of. We were starting to feel like we wouldn't find anything where both the music and the preaching measured up to Chris and Rod at FCC.
So today, we decided to take a little longer drive to church and visited Branch Creek. We were so blessed by the worship and teaching this morning. We are still in discussion about whether it is a distance we want to drive once or twice a week, especially since it will be even further away once we move over near the farm. I don't want to visit again until we decide that distance is OK (it isn't that far). I don't want to get even a little attached. But I think today, whether or not this eventually becomes our church home, I just needed a service I didn't feel the need to criticize somewhere along the line. I was able to just relax and enjoy the time. The service felt a lot like FCC, and that was just what we needed. At other churches we've visited, there was a point in each service where I felt uncomfortable. I never felt that way here, and for that I am so grateful. And hopeful.
Please pray that I will be able to continue in an attitude of peace and hope. Pray for our church home, wherever it ends up being. I feel better today than I have in a long time, so please pray that my spirits stay up. Blessings to you, friend!
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